Weak Servant of Allah

Salaam. My previous post was so merepek, I know. Haha. So, let's get to the point. Actually, I've been crying all nights since I arrived here in Nilai after Raya Aidilfitri holiday. I just couldn't understand some particular things. I've been thinking over my wrong doings to Allah, my sins towards my parents and siblings.. And my friends too. Tears rolled down on my cheeks so easily. To be exact, I'm stressed with my life now. I hardly can bear with all these heart conflict, assignments, quizzes and other responsibilities. I'm a little disappointed with my practical test on Computer subject because I struggled so hard but still, I get low marks compared to my friends who spent little time studying.

Besides, here in my campus I realized that I do not have any best friends. Yes, I know, I do have many close friends, but I need someone whom very near with me so that I can spill everything. Having a best friend here feels like you are looking for a husband LOL because every semester, we changed rooms and classes. Then, meet and make new friends. I find it a little hard to stick to my old close friends. And instead, I ended up telling them nothing about my problems ;'( Luckily, my high school best friends are still there for me but sometimes, distance can be burdensome, though, 'cause I like face-to-face conversations. And for your information, I am not a fan of texting. Tqvm.

However, there is someone who can really feel my pain. Allah. Yep, Allah has helped me faced all the challenges and He is still helping me. He sent me down the tests and He helped me back. I don't blame Allah and I will never blame Him. Allah tested me because He wanted me to return and give full submission of myself to Him. Thank You, ya Rabbi. Hoping this pain will diminish my sins and keep me awake that I am not alone in this world. Alhamdulillah.

La Takhaf Wa La Tahzan. Innallaha Ma’ana
“Janganlah kamu takut dan janganlah kamu bersedih hati.

Sesungguhnya Allah ada bersama kita”